When I first started writing this blog more than a decade ago, the reception wasn't exactly great for me to continue sharing my thoughts, opinions or observations. I questioned myself a lot during those times and seriously doubted whether I would ever garner attention for the blog. While self doubt drove me into inaction, the awareness that I was letting myself down urged me to repeatedly mount a comeback and write something after a lull period. These alternate cycles of boom and bust taught me one important thing, that come no matter what the only person I had to impress with this blog was me. Maintaining a certain standard with my blog was the highest priority. As long as I lived up to that ideal everything else that came along with it was just an added incentive. The same, I believe applies to everything you initiate in life.
The only person you have to impress with anything in life is just yourself.
Why? What about trying to impress loved ones, family members, friends or higher-ups? You might ask.
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| Set a high standard <Courtesy: Ante Hamersmit> |
There's nothing wrong with trying to win someone's appreciation or goodwill. Frankly, our entire life we keep chasing accolades from not only those we love but also from our teachers and bosses. But what happens when say you are trying to win someone's heart and the response turns out to be unsatisfactory? Do you dub everything you invested as a failure or do you learn from the attempt and come out wiser from the experience? If you are choosing the latter option, you have understood the adage that only the effort is your hands while the result isn't. If you chose the former and branded yourself as a failure then the time has come to stop hammering yourself. Tell yourself that nobody who tries hard is really a failure. So, with anything you do, give it your best shot and win yourself over with the dedication you pour into your attempts.
Even if you've achieved something significant or arduous, the external adoration might not be commensurate with what you were expecting. This is because not everyone, irrespective of how close they are to you, recognize the magnitude of the struggle that went into your achievement. The cold reception you encounter doesn't diminish your victory in the slightest. Take whatever little appreciation that comes your way as a bonus, give yourself a pat on the back for the feat and set about once again impressing yourself as you gun for bigger and better heights. Self-validation is the key to keep going when the going gets tough.
You might ask why self-validation is so important?
It's to convince this mind of ours that we are doing everything in our power to achieve our dreams. When your mind compares you with others or reminds you of how the past was better, its important to fightback and let the mind know that you are doing everything in your power to make a difference to your own life. Your mind will not be convinced that you are doing alright if your efforts flag or flatline, hence it's vital to always up your game and keep plugging away at weeding out all the regrets from your life.
Once you do this nobody else's opinion or judgement really matters. There's no better feeling in this world than to look at yourself with pride as you slowly climb the rungs of success. Remember, your biggest judge is within you, if you win in that court nothing else matters but if you win everywhere else and lose there, then that victory has no meaning.
Until Next Time,
Your life analyst.
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